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On Being Certain
By Aaron Parker
What about politics?
Ask a candidate about any issue, and they sure sound certain. Do you think someone could get elected if when asked about an issue they responded “You know, I’m not really sure about what is the right thing to do. If elected, I’ll gather a group of experts who will analyze the situation and arrive at the best available answer. Then we will look and see how our solution works, and if necessary, we will modify our plans to meet our goals more efficiently.” I think it’s much more likely that they would paint this candidate as a flip flopper or someone who doesn’t have answers. This candidate would stand next to no chance in getting elected. As a result, we have politicians who can’t even string an intelligible sentence together, but are absolutely sure about their convictions, no matter what evidence to the contrary. I’d much rather trust a candidate who says they don’t know, but tells me how they will figure out the answer, then one who claims to have all the answers going in.
What about religion?
Religion is not supposed to be about certainty. Religion is supposed to be about a basic set of principles to live by which are continually being adapted to the current world. It’s a constantly evolving pool of thoughts and beliefs. Look at the actual text of the bible. Many of the rules just don’t apply to the modern world, so we ignore them. Do we still keep slaves, but just not of our tribe? No, but the Old Testament says we can. However, this doesn’t fit into our world, so we have allowed our beliefs to evolve. This is the problem with the fundamentalist movements who assume certainty about religion. They apply their absolute views to an evolving world, and rapidly fall out of step with the mainstream. Then what happens? They get more insular and even more certain. This builds upon itself and pretty soon you get groups isolated from each other, violently opposed to anyone who doesn’t think the way they do, and willing to commit unspeakable acts because they don’t even acknowledge that the people who don’t think the way they do are even human.
I’m pretty sure that the world would be a much better place if people stopped being certain. It’s not about being cynical of everything, and never believing what you hear; it’s more about thinking critically and always seeking a better way. Keep reminding yourself that it’s possible that things are not true. It’s much better to believe that something is 99.99% probable then that it’s certainly true. The first choice leaves you open to growth. The second shuts out any new information, and prevents growth. In nature, when things stop growing, they start dying. We stagnate. Things don’t stay the same. If they aren’t getting better, they are getting worse. Being uncertain allows us to grow. Being certain allows us to feel right, but it doesn’t let us grow. It does us no good to insist that things stay the same or go back to the way they were. We need to always keep looking for better answers. I believe that this is the missing piece America has lost. We have become so sure we have all the answers, that as a nation, we have stopped listening.
For an amazing read on this subject, please pick up a copy of "The Meaning of it All," by Richard Feynman. He’s one of the great scientists and human beings of the 20th century, and it’s a fun, fast and enlightening read.
Incorporating uncertainty in your understanding, relationships and language is about being honest with oneself and others.In an counter-intuitive sense, uncertainty is actually about clarity. However, it isn't easy to live that way.
Let's say you exercise this practice in business and tell a co-worker that you will complete a task by Friday and if any problems arise you will let them know Friday morning if any and further that those problems should be resolved in any event by the following Monday. From experience I can tell you that your co-workers will consider you unclear, unprofessional, hard to deal with, and call you "slippery."
Still I'd rather be slippery and honest than slippery with dishonesty and excuses.
I didn't mean what I said here as license for anyone to be slippery in their personal dealings. I intended it more as a an approach to the world and decision making, rather then a guide to personal interaction. I think it's very important to be as true to your word as possible and to meet all your commitments. Obviously things sometimes come up, but I don't think we need to mention all the possibilities in every conversation.
I don't think there's anything wrong with saying "I'll have this to you by friday" when that's your intention, and you believe that in all likelihood you will be able to meet that deadline. If we need to spell out all possible outcomes every time we talk, conversations will become endless and boring as hell.
I also completely agree that incorporating the uncertainty into personal interactions is very important. It's too easy to disagree with someone and stop listening because you think you know the whole situation, but that ends any realistic chance of reaching an understanding. I find that's it's much more productive to try to learn something about the person and try to see how they see things. If you can do that, then even if you still disagree with them, you can debate much more effectively because now you understand their concerns, fears and needs. Otherwise, you might as well just have two tape recorders playing in an empty room for all the consensus you are going to reach.
Thanks for stnaitrg the ball rolling with this insight.
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