Dear Brothers and Sisters,

The vastness of it all, the billions of people, the myriad of stories, the pain, suffering, wars, crime, family breakdowns, disease, poverty, natural disasters, the list goes on and on. Is it any wonder that we feel disconnected, afraid and overwhelmed much of the time? There is struggle and death all around us.

Ever since I was a young girl, I was aware of how overwhelming and isolating living in our world can be. At sixteen years of age, after transcending my own existential crisis, I vowed to use my life to help alleviate the suffering I felt within me and all around me. Wanting to learn as much as I could about the human condition, I chose to go into social work. My education and subsequent internships provided me with a deeper understanding of human nature, and many of its manifestations. But there was no greater teacher than you.

Everything came together when I started working at the VNS psychiatric mobile crisis team. Our mission was to reach out to help individuals and families experiencing severe emotional and psychological distress. We covered the whole borough of Queens, working with people from all socio, economic and ethnic backgrounds. Since our services were funded by the Department of Mental Health, we had the luxury of providing our services for free.

The level of suffering I encountered remains unspeakable; from the pregnant young woman whose husband shot himself in front of her; to the elderly woman living in squalor, unable to pay for her medicine; to the parents trying desperately to help their schizophrenic child; to the children of the drug addicted mom prostituting herself to get her next high; to the AIDS or cancer patient in hospice; to the parents whose child died when a tree fell on his school bus; to the children who are trying to keep their Alzheimer’s father safe; to the families of the victims on Flight TWA800; to counseling the traumatized victims of the World Trade Center bombing– I felt it all.

Life is never as acute as when one is in the midst of death. There is no posturing or pretending, there is just the undeniable rawness of the moment. People are not concerned with looking good, being right, or any of the other superficial desires that pervade our ordinary life. There is only one need – to live in love, without suffering. Living in this heightened sense of what is genuinely real and important - with all its agony and tragedy - creates an environment of authentic relatedness between people.

It was in this context that I had the privilege to serve you, thereby experiencing some of the tenderest, most open and loving moments in my life. Everyday, I experienced the power of intimacy that exists between human beings when we are stripped down to our emotional nakedness. You let me into your inner most thoughts and feelings, putting your lives in my hands, revealing all that is in you. In the face of unimaginable challenges, you exhibited an indefatigable spirit, beckoning me to rise with you above the fray. People often asked me how do you this everyday? Doesn’t it drain you? Don’t you get burnt? The contrary was true; working with you fueled, enriched and empowered me. You were a constant reminder of the beauty and strength existing in each and every one of us. With awe and humility, I never underestimated your power for self healing.